I guess I’d gotten used to thinking of myself as a very small, out-of-the-way blogger with an audience made up primarily of some local women I have met in the flesh along with a handful of others, mostly other readers of Bub and Pie and a few other bloggers who I found through comments. So far, the only “anonymous” comments I’ve received have been of the spam variety. So I was a bit surprised to find this remark from Anonymous* on Wednesday morning:
My initial instinct was to reply in the comments. The first comment would have been less than courteous; that was never written. I started on another one, but decided it was too long. I figured Trillian would pop in with something—or maybe ‘pop off’ would be the correct term. But she decided that she wouldn’t be able to stay within the bounds of common decency, so she and I just talked about it.
Why was it a shock that dishing out dough for something that should cost nothing will get you in there as fast as you want? I understand wanting to do everything you can for your son, trust me, I do, but I worry that trusting private clinics to do the job simply means that some other kid will fall through the cracks.
But then again, you are American. Paying for something that
offers for free must feel natural. Canada
Luckily some of my usual readers, women who have followed my blog long enough to understand my intent, stopped by and said a bit of what I wanted to. So my first point has pretty much been made. This is what I call the Mama Bear response—instinctive protectiveness, you could get your face chewed off, etc. OK, so there are really two points here.
- I will go out of my way to do what I think is best for my son. It is my job. I don’t even see this as giving my son an unfair advantage, as I expect that’s what most mothers are doing.
- Back the fuck off. Seriously. Mama Bear has calmed down for now. But it is wise not to poke the bear.
That said, let me say a few more things. I doubt I’ll get to absolutely everything I have intended to say, but I will make a valiant effort. I generally avoid criticizing
I have not made it a secret that I detest the university health plan. Technically, it is equivalent to OHIP. Technically. They cover all the same things. But they place a dollar limit on how much they will cover for each procedure. And not every office will accept UHIP or requires payment up front; none of them are supposed to turn someone with UHIP away, but they can make it nearly impossible for a person to fulfill their up-front requirements. I was set to have a midwife and deliver at
I also found out while doing my research a couple months ago that UHIP is entirely funded by members’ premiums. And so every service I seek through my insurance is charged against that amount and, ultimately, determines how much my out-of-pocket cost will increase. And then we pay extra for some sort of supplemental insurance to cover dental, vision, and prescriptions (reimbursement only with strict yearly limits). That is why our premiums increased about 90% between my first and second year; we are now paying two to three times what we did in the
Then there is also the issue that the particular combination of services and philosophy of treatment we will be getting at the private clinic is not available through provincial services, at least not as far as we can tell. Speech therapy (which is a provincial service outside of health care) and occupational therapy (through a non-UHIP provider) are a piece of the whole puzzle—and we will be getting those through official channels. The developmental pediatrician might suggest some additional therapy and coordinate the treatment. But the sensory processing piece, what we think is the biggest piece, is not generally addressed by any of those. And no, Scooter is not so bad off that he simply cannot function. He is not in the same position as some of the kids we saw at the clinic this week. My heart goes out to them—and to their Canadian parents who have also decided to work outside
Mad Hatter’s comment addresses the other topic I could say quite a bit on, but I will restrain myself to some quick remarks only since I’ve gone on so long already. The system is broken. This certainly seems to be the case in
I will stop there. Not because I’m done, but because I’ve calmed down a bit. And would really like to settle in for at least a few hours of hibernation.
* I should point out that I can easily match ISP addresses to comments via StatCounter. Maybe I don’t have your name—though I could probably figure that out if I really wanted to. But it is important to remember that there is no true anonymity on the internet.