While in the car for a couple hours last week, I had a long and spirited debate about this whole trying-to-get-pregnant thing. OK, so I was the only one in the car, but I'm a passionate arguer. The debate: where to go from here?
The process has already been draining, more so than before. The major problem has been coordinating a minimum 5-hour trip (and usually more like 6 or 6 1/2 when I leave extra time for traffic and if I have to wait a little before a nurse can see me) to Nearby US City with my school obligations--teaching, office hours, my own classes--and my family--making sure Trillian can get Scooter to or from school and that they don't need the car. Needless to say, it can be difficult to coordinate and a source of much stress. With the added complication of the plague that has overrun my household, those 5+ hours take away greatly from other things I could be, need to be, doing.
So while I really want to be pregnant (NOW already!) and have my second before my son turns 2 1/2, I've decided to take a two-month break. That will get into the next semester, when my schedule will open up significantly, as I will not be teaching. I hope also to use the break to get better (since I'm still coughing), let my family recuperate, and maybe work out a bit.
This is where the irony fairy could suddenly work her magic. Because this debate I had? On my way back from the fertility clinic. (That's try #3, for those following along at home.)
I doubt that I'm pregnant, given (TMI alert!) that my egg had already been released before the insemination and my cervix was not quite aligned or fully open. The nurse assured me that about 50% of the women who conceive have sonograms that show the egg has been released, but I also know that the time I did conceive, the insemination occurred just a little early. Similarly, the position and openness of the cervix tends to indicate the body's receptivity and fertility at the moment, so I suspect we just missed the window.
On the other hand, it would be just about right for me to finally* get pregnant when I am ready to take a breather.
*'Finally,' I say, as if I've been trying for ages. The last cycle was particularly disappointing because all of the signs pointed to peak fertility.