Ho ho holy sh...

Although retailers have notoriously been stocking the shelves with Christmas items earlier and earlier, US Thanksgiving remains the imaginary line beyond which all retail-hell breaks loose. Since I've been cultivating habits of mindful consumption and have a son who has a very short wish list,* the TV ads for after-Thanksgiving sales took me by surprise.

Every year, one of my cousins spends part of Thanksgiving afternoon pouring over the advertising supplements and planning out her route for the next morning. She gets a charge out of going out to the stores insanely early and completing all of her holiday shopping by 10 am.

I, however, am hugely averse to large crowds of people who are set on specific items and willing to push through anyone in their way. Trillian and I tend to do our shopping online and/or make gifts ourselves. Even if we don't get the monster deals of Black Friday shopping, I am willing to view the extra cost as a convenience surcharge (or maybe the cost of sanity).

In any case, one of the shocks yesterday was seeing the ads for stores that would be open at 4 a.m. 4 a.m. I already think that the "doorbusters" at 5 and 6 in the morning are a little crazy. But seeing this new bit of insanity, I begin to wonder how long it will be before stores open at midnight.

I'm not a Grinch, I'm not a Scrooge. I enjoy figuring out what exactly to get for everyone on my list and have a pretty good track record. But I'm not at all fond of the barrage of commercials during this season or the frenzy at malls and big-box stores.

Which is why I'll be glad once we make it past the holidays. And the after-Christmas sales. Argh, almost forgot about those.

*No, seriously. I've started asking him what he wants for Christmas and Hanukkah and he has a one-item list: a $30 Lego set which he has wanted since this past summer and which I know my mother-in-law has already tucked away in a closet. When I asked what else he wanted, he just said, "A tree and presents." He doesn't care what, just wants the Christmas morning experience.

Admission is not defeat

Last night, I finally allowed myself to admit that I was not going to be able to handle the month of December as I had it mapped out. The short version:

• Very beginning of December, drive down to Capital City with Trillian and Scooter.
• Fly back a few days later.
• Mid-December, seminar exam.
• 3 and 4 days later, exam over 1st half of comps (it's two 1/2 days of writing).
• Next day, packers box up all of our stuff.
• Day after that, movers load up all of our stuff.
• The following day, my seminar paper is due.
• Finally, I fly out to my family.

For a long time, I convinced myself that I could manage this, that I could balance everything and not flip out worrying about moving just before I had to go into my exams.

But the past couple of days have brought a few new things--niggling little things, a presentation, a proposal for the second half of my comps, a committee meeting--that have stolen study time. Just a few hours here and there, but enough to derail my study plans to the point that completing all of my comps reading becomes a greater source of tension.

So I sent an email to the supervisor of this part of my comps this morning. Admitted that I'd packed my December too full, that I would be dealing with too much at the time of my exam to write with a clear head, that it would be a huge weight off if I could push it back to January or February, that I was hoping to write the exam remotely (this had been mentioned for the second half of my comps). That I would stand by my original date if this was too difficult a request for any reason, that I could still be ready, but that I would really appreciate the chance to do this when I wouldn't be feeling so overwhelmed.

I hate admitting when I've taken on too much--not so much to Trillian or my friends, but definitely to people in positions of power over me. I worry about showing anything that might be considered weakness to those whose judgment of me can affect outcomes. And so I very carefully pick the moments when I do this, when I ask for some concession or accommodation, when I admit that I can't do it all.

Now I just have to make the best use of this reprieve that I possibly can.

Because we all need another time suck

Have you found freerice.com? Test your vocabulary skills and donate rice through the United Nations. The rice is paid for by the sponsors whose ads appear at the bottom of each screen. You can categorize the time you spend on this site as both education and philanthropy.

I mean, seriously, it would be downright selfish of you not to go play, right?

What I'm watching

Although I began the semester with the intention of not watching much television, that plan hasn't come to fruition. In part, it's due to the fact that when I'm particularly productive, something my library carrel has facilitated, I don't have the concentration to power through another few hours of heavy reading. So instead I allow myself to sit on the couch, leisurely work on less rigorous tasks (email to my supervisor, compiling information I have handwritten in various places, looking for call numbers for books I need), and watch TV.

Herewith are the shows playing on our television on different nights of the week. Thanks to time shifting and the occasions when Canadian channels play shows on different nights from US stations, I have no idea if we're watching things at their "regular" time.

Sunday:

• Simpsons. No need to explain or justify.
• Other Sunday night cartoons. We usually leave these on, although I don't miss them if we don't.

Monday:

• How I Met Your Mother. A funny, funny show; we laugh out loud every time. Barney is reprehensible, but marvelously played by Neil Patrick Harris. We also get a kick out of the Canada jokes.
• The Big Bang Theory. The only new sitcom we're watching. Hilarious. A lot of quick-fire dialog that uses math, physics, and other nerd humor at its base. Courtesy of this exchange, Trillian and I now say to each other, "Superman could catch her, but he would slice her into three equal parts," whenever one of us goes off on a tangent considering the ramifications of various theoretical circumstances (which happens a lot more than I should even admit). We also debate whether Scooter is more likely to be a Sheldon or a Leonard.

Tuesday:

• Pushing Daisies. This was created by the same guy who created Wonderfalls, which I have mentioned before as one of those shows I loved only to see it yanked off the air before it got a fair chance. Again, the main character (played by the actor who was the brother on Wonderfalls) has an otherworldly ability that he must keep (mostly) secret at the same time that it compels him to do things he wouldn't otherwise. Not your average network offering, and I am so glad that it seems to be picking up a following.
• Biggest Loser. The only reality show Trillian and I watch. And we usually miss the first half hour or hour, depending on when it starts vis a vis Pushing Daisies. I like the positive aspects of the changes the contestants go through. That said, I most dislike the game-playing side, and that will be the thing that makes it easy to stop watching at some point.

Wednesday:

• Private Practice. Total brain candy. Good cast, generally amusing, even when the "big message" of the episode is too saccharine. We mostly started watching because it's there.
• Bionic Woman. Ronald Moore, the man who is behind the updated Battlestar Galactica, brings us this much darker Bionic Woman. I like dark. I would also be lying if I said I started watching for any reason than Katee Sackhoff. She plays Sarah Corvus, the original bionic woman, who is supposed to be dead after going a bit haywire. She is a delicious nemesis, and I most love those episodes in which she has a fight scene. But the rest of the show is growing on me too--even though I keep hoping for Isaiah Washington's character to meet a messy death.

Thursday:

• Ugly Betty. We started watching this part of the way through the first season and are hooked.
• Grey's Anatomy. Another one that has hooked us. We have kept watching, even when we're screaming at the television over ridiculous storylines (George and Izzy? You've got to be kidding me!). And yet we keep watching.
• Thursday has been the hardest night for us since we also like the sitcoms that play opposite these shows. So we've decided to catch My Name is Earl, The Office, 30 Rock, and Scrubs in reruns since it's usually easier to catch up on sitcoms. And with the writer's strike, that could be sooner than later.

Friday and Saturday are the empty nights for us, so that's when we make use of the library system's inter-library system and extensive DVD collection. Once we're back in the States, those will be Netflix nights.

So, are you watching the same shows or now wondering what the hell kind of person I am?

Scattered Sunday

I have not been nearly productive enough this weekend; I seem to have stalled out a bit again due to the growing list of things to do and shrinking amount of time. But I'm not going to dwell on all of that tonight. Instead, random moments from the weekend.

• We took Scooter for a haircut. He got the same stylist as two cuts ago, a very good thing. She is amazingly quick and accurate, giving excellent shape to the cut in a very short amount of time. To Scooter's credit, he didn't cry at all, didn't even protest. Still refused the clippers to clean up the edges, but he just shook his head no instead of crying or yelling.
• Trillian got a haircut too. Which means I'm the 1/3 of the family that didn't.
  
• Scooter and I started a four-week series of workshops at the Ontario Science Centre. The highlight is getting to play for half an hour in KidSpark before it opens to the general public--just him and 4 other kids! Of course, he still managed to have a fit over sharing some space with one of them.
  
• Trillian and I whispered to each other in amazement as Scooter worked on letter-matching cards we got him some time ago. He has known his letters for a long time, but has found most activities too frustrating or boring or difficult (particularly in terms of fine motor skills). But today, he pulled them off his shelf, asked what he was supposed to do, and then completed the whole set once I'd shown him the first one (plus I had to help with 'x' since they gave 'fox' as the 'x' word--seriously 'xylophone' or 'x-ray' wouldn't work? ).
  
• Vegan cheese does not melt well. Even the brand that proclaims on its label "It melts!" This is the missing piece for making pizza that Scooter and I can eat, and we're not quite there yet.
• Many conversations with Trillian now include phrases like "once we're settled into our new house" and "we'll need to find one of those in Springfield or Capital City." We're a little excited.

But then my mind turns to things like getting the tires on the car looked at, along with going through more items to toss, recycle, pack, etc. And so I will just stop for the moment.

Mentally moving in

Even from Toronto, we've already experienced some of the small town hospitality that Springfield has to offer.

The current owners of the house we're buying offered to give an informal walk-through so they could explain some of the systems and answer questions. Since we won't be there until after closing (ah, internet and fax machine, how you have simplified the process!), my in-laws went for us. Probably didn't hurt that my mother-in-law has been dying to see the inside.

My in-laws went last night and reported back to us. With so much wonderful information that makes me love our new house, our new neighborhood, our new school system all the more. Among the tidbits:

• We have fruit trees! The cherry trees and apple tree all produce fruit; the apricot trees are not reliable because it frequently gets just a bit too cold for them. We managed to visit when the trees weren't bearing fruit, so I thought we didn't have any; other houses had peach trees heavy with fruit and/or made specific mention of what trees they did have.
• The wife usually plants a vegetable garden and has two beds designated for this. She hasn't used one of them for a while, because the dogs kept walking through it, but she says the soil in it is excellent.
• Both of their kids went to the public preschool and have used the special education services at the school 5 blocks away. They couldn't say enough good about the school system. And the head of that department lives in the next cul-de-sac over.
• They've already told the neighbors that we're coming, and everybody is looking forward to meeting us. Including the lesbian couple with kids who live right behind us.
• There are 8 kids on our cul-de-sac alone.
  
• One of the older residents on our cul-de-sac makes toy shooters (that shoot mini-marshmallows) for all the kids when it warms up and then all the neighborhood kids chase each other around, making special use of the weeping elm in our front yard as a fort.
• They are leaving us an enormous binder with all of the instruction manuals and additional information for everything they can think of. They will also be passing along the name of painters so we can get a couple rooms done (we're leaving most of their painting as is, but want color in the master bedroom and don't want a pink office).

I know that handing over the check for the rest of the down payment plus closing costs will be one of those moments that knocks the wind out of me; I try not to think about it too closely, especially since we will still have some savings left over and the whole point of that account was to earn interest until we bought another house. But I don't think I will suffer from actual buyer's remorse. Because every new piece of information just convinces me further that we have made the right decision.

And I can't wait until it's our furniture in there, our art on the walls, our son on the slide. Our house.

Candy for breakfast

Or, what we did for Halloween.

All in all, it was a pretty good Halloween.

Scooter began the day by discovering the Halloween basket that had been sent to him by his grandparents. Not exactly a healthy breakfast, but Halloween's only once a year.

(What he didn't know: Grandma ordered the basket before finding out about our change in his diet. It arrived on Tuesday and so I spent some time picking out the verboten candy--most of it--and replacing it with some items I had already purchased.)

We then headed to school, his astronaut costume carefully tucked into a bag. Scooter checked multiple times to make sure it really was in there! When we got there, the other kids were wearing their costumes, so he eagerly slipped his on. One of the younger kids, visiting with his teacher, wore the same costume. Luckily, Scooter didn't take that as encroachment on his territory and happily pointed out to others that there were now two astronauts.

I picked Scooter, not out of costume, up shortly after lunch for OT. As we traveled to his appointment, I asked if he wanted to wear his costume. He said no each time, but quickly changed his mind when we arrived and another kid had her costume on.

When he finished his appointment, in the spirit of an extra fun day, I offered to take him to the CN Tower. He agreed with that plan until we got home--then he just wanted to shuck the costume and play with his trains. Since the whole point was to have fun, we settled in and covered the living room floor with tracks.

A little after 6 pm, I asked Scooter if he wanted to go over to the coffee shop to trick-or-treat. One last time into the costume. Then he started asking us, first Trillian and then me, what we were going to wear. He seemed so disappointed that Trillian said she didn't have a costume that when my eyes fell on my Eeyore costume (where it had been placed in preparation for storage), I decided to put it on. As we walked over to the coffee shop, he would start each statement to me with, "Eeyore..." And I would respond, "Yes, astronaut?"

We dropped off our canned goods, ordered a couple of drinks and a treat for Scooter (plus a treat bag from the baristas), and enjoyed a little family time in costume.

Home for bedtime with a story about pumpkins, and a very tired astronaut-no-more told me Halloween was fun. I imagine that next year will involve actual trick-or-treating, but last night's low key approach worked for me!