Friday, June 01, 2007

Blogging for LGBT Families--Today and Everyday

Today is "Blogging for LGBT Families Day" and Mombian is keeping track of posts over at her place. In yesterday's post, I talked about the second-parent adoption that gave our family legal status. But if you look back through my archives, you'll see that I've frequently written about being a lesbian parent and the issues that brings up. And since I have always spoken about my family in a straightforward manner, any post about family events is, by definition, also a post about gay parenting.

Since I'm about two months shy of blogging for a year, this is the first "Blogging for LGBT Families Day" I've participated in, and I thought I would share some of the pieces I've written that touch on the topic.

In August, Her Bad Mother wrote about trying to express how her love for her daughter existed on a physical level; she called upon her readers to help her in this. And so I responded with My missing piece. Soon after, she had another post citing an email she received from a non-bio mom and the sorts of fear being in that position created for her. The post resonated strongly in me, in part out of sympathy for my wife, but also because I recognized some of that fear as coming from being a lesbian mom. My reaction was Fear of the (other) mother.

In response to another call to action from HBM, I wrote about how important gay rights are to me as a means for Protecting my family. And then in February, to mark both "Freedom to Marry Week" and my wedding anniversary, I wrote On marriage. There's also a lighter post figuring out What's in a name when there are two mommies.

Of course, the topic of being a lesbian-headed family has a tendency to creep into other posts, such as an answer to Sandra's question of what I'll miss most about Canada. And the fact that Scooter has two mommies is apparent in most family-related posts, from co-sleeping to his move to a big boy bed. Maybe I'd feel a little more revolutionary if Thomas the Tank Engine didn't make so many appearances.


cinnamon gurl said...

Just read your cosleeping post and boy could do I wish I'd read that when you wrote it! It's so good to hear that cosleeping with a baby does not subject you to sleeping with a 4-year old. People suck.

cinnamon gurl said...

Oh and Swee'pea always sleeps in the middle and Sugar D was always pretty aware of him too.

Lisa b said...

Bring on the Thomas revolution!

Your honesty about your fears has made me realise I have to be even more outspoken in my support of everyone who wants to create a loving family in whatever manner they choose.

Laural said...

Well written - and I went in and read a ton of the Mombian posts.
The woman I look to for much of my parenting advice (or more like, "please say this is a phase" guidance) is a lesbian, and is raising her child with her partner.
I kind of just took it for granted - but after reading all the posts I realized she probably had a lot more stuggles than I realized.
The one thing I've noticed that all these posts had in common (without it being blatantly said in most) is just how much more appreciation there is for the process leading up to having a child.
For me pregnancy was a shock, so I didn't appreciate it that much at first. It made me step back and appreciate some of the stuff I take for granted.

Vikki said...

I just read the piece about the "other mother". It was very striking.

I will have to come back and check out the rest...they all seem interesting.

thailandchani said...

Found this via Just Posts.

You are so right and raise a very, very important issue. What matters is that children and others are raised/live in a loving environment. The configuration really doesn't mean much.